I read a blog post not long ago that suggested we should all check our email only twice a day. Twice a day? Is that even possible? It may not seem possible but it sure is needed. Believe it our not, despite our over connected lives and reliance on technology for everything, we actually need some unplugged time alone and as a family.
Technology has certainly made our lives more efficient and created an explosion of ways for adults and kids of all ages to connect over the last decade. The amount of that explosion at times has seemed almost unfathomable since the new millenium has arrived, hasn’t it!?
Think about it. Technology helps connect and has allowed ways to connect that seem almost out of a scifi movie from Star Trek for many of us! We now connect instantly and on smaller and smaller devices. That’s cool…and very sci fi given where most of us started in our lives.
However, it can also be addicting, mind draining, and reinforce negative messages. And, where the internet is concerned, there are social dangers for adults and kids. We’ve become a society where phones are “so yesterday” and conversations become virtual. There are dangers in that and people become trusting in ways not based in reality. That is a scary issue for parents to grapple with for our kids and we’re just now seeing a turn of the tides in parents realizing that kids may be more capable and safe online than they realized.
The bigger issues aside, just pause a moment and consider how many ways you use technology in a give day. There’s the basics: telephone, computer, video games, cell phones. You may IM someone, text another, email the next. You likely e-chat more than truly talk to people on most days. How many projects are you working on with people you have never met all made possible by technology – email, video calls and e-meetings. Sometimes having a real meeting is a breath of fresh air after all this e-connectiveness!
With the New Year here, one of the best ways you can help you and your family is to do some serious technology cleaning and streamlining. Would you believe some workplaces are actually starting “email free Fridays”? And, I find myself working at Starbucks a lot just to not have email dinging every few minutes.
What can you do to get your family more media healthy? Many things.
First, you have to admit you all have a problem! In fact, we all do. We all watch or listen or type too much. A multitude of studies this year have focused on the impact on TV on our kids and it is clear that “too much” is bad. The problem is that studies are not yet clear on which is the more important element, time or content, when TV becomes linked to attention issues from “too much”. At the same time, studies this year have demonstrated no harm in good, educational programming for young children. More studies will need to be done to help us sort this out a bit more.
So, gather your family around the kitchen table, talk about your media use and ways you can be less controlled by it. If it will help you, read the following Media-Family pledge and have everyone sign it:
Dr. Gwenn’s Family Media-Friendly Pledge
- I will never choose media or technology over my family.
- I will use technology responsibly by not
- Texting or talking while driving
- using my cell phone in line for anything
- using technology to harm others by engaging in bullying or slanderous actions
- I will try and keep my total screen time to 2 hours a day except when doing a project for school.
- I will not watch shows or play games that scare me or are inappropriate for friends and family watching or playing with me.
- Kids: I will never give out personal information online or by text and will avoid all chat room except ones my mom and dad have looked at and approved.
- Parents: I will check what my kids are doing online and on their phones.
- Kids: I understand my parents have a right to check into my media history on my computer or phone.
- We will talk as a family at a meal a day with no technology in sight!
- We will agree to technology free times such as weekends and vacations.
- When in doubt, family first! If media gets in the way, we need to recognize we are utilizing it too much or in a way that is not helping our family.
Here’s to a wonderful New Year with more media awareness, less time plugged into something, and more quality time with people off line that actually matter in our lives!
(Originally posted January 2008; updated January 2011)
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