The New School Year: How to Help Your Kindergartner (and you) Adjust!

Did you ever notice how much angst Labor Day creates for your family? No real surprise when you consider that Labor Day marks the official end of summer and the start of a new school year. Parents now have to get back into the furious pace of carpools, dueling schedules, after school activities, homework not to mention helping their children transition to new things. Children have to readjust to having a schedule, meeting new people, new expectations, perhaps more homework, and for some a new school. Most school-aged children are old pros at the "beginning-of-the-year-dance" and know they will survive. Kindergartners, however, have no idea about the world they are about to enter and for them this step is huge and very overwhelming.

The world of school to a kindergartner is like you and I visiting a foreign land with a different language, laws and customs. They have to deal with many new things all at once: new routines, new faces, and perhaps new ways of getting to school. In a few days to weeks, they will be old pros themselves but at the moment they are strangers in a strange land! Here are some tips to make the world of kindergarten much less foreign and scary for both you and your child:

1. Ask your child how he feels about starting school. He or she may not be worried at all at the moment but just asking will tell your child that you are there to talk if needed. Most children are a little nervous even if they don’t show it. The best way to prepare is handle this is to wait for it to occur, give your child lots of hugs and reassure him that all children are a bit nervous. There are some great books on starting school that deal with this topic that you may want to read to your child.
2. Encourage your child to make new friends. Play dates, trips to parks, or encouraging your child to play with new children at recess go along way. If your child is particularly shy, talk to your child’s teacher about ways to help her but don’t push too hard; a very shy child needs to expand her social horizons slowly or she will become very nervous. Sometimes a parent/child class can help with this – your child will have the reassurance that you are nearby but will also have the opportunity to interact with other children, with your help if needed.
3. Help create a daily routine that your child can follow and take part in- from picking out clothes before bed each night to remembering to give you important notices. Keep it simple and add to it as the year goes on.
4. Expect your child’s appetite to change- either increased or decreased. Keep an eye on this and adjust snacks and meals as needed. Some children don’t feel hungry when they are busy, others don’t want to eat unless they are home, and others get more hungry because they are busier than they are used to. I’d suggest starting with what has worked for your child in preschool for snacks and lunch and adjust from there. Once your have a sense of your child’s routine, moods and hunger pattern, you can adjust as needed. Of course, if more snacks are needed, try to encourage healthy choices – fruits, veggie sticks, yogurt, pretzels.
5. Expect some moodiness after school. Remember that your child has to follow many rules during the day and the pace of the day is not in his or her control. This is a huge task for a young child and takes some practice. So, expect some emotional zaniness when your child comes home and allow it within reason.
6. Reassure your child that school is safe - that teachers are safe. This is very confusing to young children because teachers are strangers at first and we all teach our children to not talk to strangers. Storybooks and videos are very helpful here.
7. Review transportation safety tips with your child. And, make sure your child understands how he is getting to and from school. Review safety tips that are particular for your child’s daily routine. If your child is a walker, review “road rules”. Make sure he understands not to cross the road without an adult and to look both ways. Also review stranger safety – particularly if your child is not walking to and from school with you but with other older children or other parents. It is never wise to have a small child walk by himself. If your child is able to ride a bike, I’d advise not allowing him to ride the bike to school – small children don’t have the coordination or control to deal with riding the bike in traffic situations. Finally, if your child is being driven to school, make sure he wears a seat belt (if available – some buses don’t have seat belts) and remains sitting during the entire trip. If he is riding the bus, make sure an adult he knows is at his stop at the end of the day to greet him and walk him safely home.
8. Help your child learn his address and phone number “just in case”. This will take some practice but is well worth the effort. Be sure your child’s backpack has this information in it too.
9. Try and keep your child’s after school activities to a reasonable pace. While it is tempting to sign them up for an activity a day, you may find your child quickly hitting overload with all the new things.
10. Finally, provide the maximum amount of hugs that you can!! Let your child know how proud you are off being such a big kid and being so brave. In the end, this will carry your child through even the most stressful new beginnings because she will know that you will be there with open arms when she gets home - no matter what!

Have a fun, safe start of the school year.

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