Q&A: Boy calls 911 over KFC meal

Q: We were shopping recently and my 5 year old wanted to have dinner at KFC. We told him “no” but that we’d go another time that weekend. He whined a bit but then calmed down and did not mention it again. A few minutes after arriving home, we received a call from the police. Our 5 year old had called 911 to “report his mean parents”. We told him that the police were coming at his request but not to talk to us – to talk to him. He was so scared that he hid under the bed for a while. The policemen who came over were wonderful and explained the 911 call as a boy who cried wolf example. On some levels we do find this a bit amusing because of how over the top it was, and in the thought it took for our son to even consider calling 911. On the other hand, this is completely out of character for him – he is usually very calm and is doing well in school. Is this 911 incident something to worry about or just one of those “kid moments” we’d all rather forget? - From B. (mother of three boys, ages 5, 3, and 4 months)

A: Kids will do some over-the-top things at times – experiment with how far they can push us parents. While distressing, it is completely normal and will occur with every child at some point or another. While your son may be a calm child at heart, he is also a child experiencing many new challenges and transitions – all of which can quickly exhaust their 5-year-old reserves. Just going to kindergarten is a stress – longer days, higher expectations socially and academically, and more time away from home.

And, let’s not forget the addition of a baby brother not long ago – which to some kids may be the cherry on a sundae but to others the straw that broke the camel’s back. It’s no wonder he is feeling a bit overwhelmed and small issues, like where to have dinner, are becoming huge.

Talk to his teachers and see how things are at school. And, at home, find ways to give him control where possible – perhaps let him help with dinner or create the menu for the day. And, be sure he has some time without the other kids, both with you and your husband together and individually. A parent in the ER recently told me that she guarantees to each of her kids 20-30minutes of dedicated time with her that the other kids can not intrude on. It has also helped show her young kids in a concrete way that no one child gets more of mom than the others. If your son really seems to need some down time, consider paring back on the activities including playdates. Some kids do better overall when their day is kept simple.

From the perspective of a stressed 5 year old, this was not a case of the boy who cried wolf because there was an emergency. Keep in mind that 5 year old kids are very concrete and impulsive, and don’t have the vocabulary to really express their feelings, especially when stressed. So, we have to extrapolate from their actions what is really going on.

Give some of the above ideas a try and you might just find your son back to his old very soon. If not, or if he continues to have significant outbursts or extreme behaviors, talk to your pediatrician, your son’s school, or a professional counselor for further advice.

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